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July 10, 2008

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Fred Farnsworth

Periodically, men have arrived in the ER with the same complaint: "Doctor, my junk is purple." The culprit is always a metal cock ring that got stuck. I've learned that regular ring cutters available in the ER don’t work. The time it takes to get more powerful (and cringe inducing) wire cutters does not help calm the patient’s nerves.

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I think I'm safe to say that if you get a cock ring then you probably deserve any consequences.

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